We were both laughing at her feigned anger. I crawled onto the bed beside her. We hugged and kissed for several minutes while she played with my hair.Once totally relaxed, she asked, "What were you thinking about when I walked in? You looked deep in thought." I was just thinking about returning to work and everything I need to do." Back to reality, huh?" Unfortunately. Maybe you can help me think of the best way to make amends to those employees I hurt during the last two years." Why did you hurt them?" I was taking my grief out on them and they just took it and never complained. I've come to realize just how ugly I was to some of them and I want to apologize in some way." Maybe you could take your own advice and just sit down face to face with each one and talk through what happened. A sincere apology from you personally will go a long way."I gazed into her eyes and reflected on that. "You're right. I'll call Ron, my general manager, and get everyone's schedule. I'll go to the. I had thought, I had loved but damn, it's time to Fuck, I thought.So down on highway 51 I went that night for what seemed hours. Cars, people, no eye contact. Searching for a green eyed goddess he spotted me, and as a cheetah in dusk he pounced."hey, do you have any matches" he grinnedI settled my head up and my eyes focused, um, yes I chattered, hold this.My cd player, my cigarettes, some loose papers in my pockets, I had him hold it alland he grinnedHis smile, still engrained upon my corneas as I am never to forget him, my first, my Ben Boy.quickly I decided as I had decided before "the next man that wants to fuck, I will"and that we did, but first we stopped at the park, and gazed upThe MOON! so full, so bright and him so dark, nothing but a smiling jackal he was that night...I led him to my doorand there upon the way tossed into the air, my water. Your water is in my err! he yelled, and I said "of course it is"...that was the end of my beginning, the end of wanting, right in.
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