John Pollard opened his front door on his return from the airport to a house which felt more empty than it had after the funeral, when everyone had gone home.The calendar in the hallway reminded him what day it was. He smiled at the irony of parting from Claire on Valentine’s day. He always found it amusing that the feast day of a celibate priest who was killed for his faith should now be the occasion of rampant lust and sexual desire!He wondered if the story was true that Valentine died because he defied the Emperor Claudius and promoted marriage. The story was that Claudius forbade marriage among the young since he thought unmarried soldiers would fight more bravely without worrying about a wife at home.So, John thought, it could be a relevant day for Claire to go back to try to save her marriage on that day.He made tea out of habit, and sat in the back room looking out over the garden, its winter state mitigated by the swathes of crocuses and snowdrops along the flower beds. The. “You have something of mine, but I don’t have anything of yours.”“That’s easy to fix,” Brad replied. “What do you want?”“I want ... I want ... your ... your...” Kim couldn’t bring herself to say “penis” or any synonym. Instead she just pointed at his groin.“You want my prick?” he asked.Kim couldn’t even speak. Instead she just nodded vigorously and pointed again.“And my balls?”“Y ... yes,” she managed to stammer.“Okay,” he replied with a grin. “They’re yours.” Then he grinned and teased, “I didn’t realize you had a speech impediment.”“What!” she squawked.“Well...” he began and paused. “You seem to have a great deal of difficulty with simple Anglo-Saxon words.”“It’s ... It’s—”“There you go again,” he interrupted.“Now you listen to me, Bradley Kramer!” she nearly screamed. “Those are words I’ve never even thought of, let alone used, until today. It’s what happens when one’s parents are elderly, and the father thinks she’s incompetent and the mother is hyper-protective of an ugly girl.
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