She was kissing me so passionately and pushing her body so hard against mine that I started to become turned on and embarrassed. ‘I’m sorry baby, I’m not ready for this…’ I couldn’t tell her. How do you tell the most amazing girl, who probably has nothing that she isn’t confident about that you are too worried you won’t be good enough for her to do anything other than kiss and cuddle? I could feel myself start to swell and harden and didn’t want to be too small, not live up to her expectations. I mean, Lilli wasn’t my going to be my first, but I really wanted her to be happy. ‘Zac?’ Lil asked me with a confused look on her face. ‘What’s wrong?’ ‘I…it doesn’t matter, we should get a start on our homework,’ I suggested, not able to look her in the eyes. She wriggled over to me and made me look at her. ‘What is it Zacy? You can tell me anything,’ she prompted. ‘It’s just I’m worried I’m not gunna be good enough for you Lil, you’re so amazing and I’m me, it’s scary not knowing what. It was Shilla, hi Eve, I’ve got your party goodies and I have something to tell you when you come over to pick them up. Shilla was at her best, hiding information, always making a mystery out of everything. I said I would call over at eight o clock as Tom would be in for his tea around six thirty and had a squash match on at the leisure centre, so I would get him to drop me off on route and then pick me up on his way home. Not another party, said Tom when I asked him to drop me off at Shillas’. No, I’m just picking up some things and anyway it’s been four weeks since I last saw her. Tom just grunted in his usual way and muttered, okay. Shilla was all flushed with excitement when I arrived at her house, come on and see what I received as a gift for hosting the party. The lounge floor was scattered with all types of sexy lingerie and sex toys. Shilla held up a most daring sexy dress in see through black and a huge dildo, she also had fluffy handcuffs, massage oil,.
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