And the poor guy ended up dead. Since his death, he had not been able to befriend a single cop in the precinct. They all considered him to be smug, defiant, a renegade. In the past, he had endangered the lives of other cops when he would take up his personalized brand of police justice, catching criminals in an action-film-hero type way, forgetting the real world was nothing like that. There had been wild car chases and equally wild motorcycle chases, stunts, leaps over bridges, fast-paced pursuits by foot into dangerous areas and the like. Some of the cops he had been paired with had ended up in Intensive Care at the hospital. Hudson took out old photographs from a box. He placed them on the nightstand, and others above the small fireplace in his living room which he absolutely loved having, feeling a lot more at the Professor’s level since he had a fireplace in his own apartment in Park Slope. The ones in the nightstand were black and white photos of Kyle Lennox and his ex. .”I've always found an aspect of performance in every interaction with another person, a failing of mine, I suppose. Even if the conversation is easy, the company familiar and warm, everything I say and do still feels mannered - as though I could have chosen to do everything another way and yet still remain myself. And as I roll my hand over the enticing curve of her bottom, I think of those past performances. At some point over the past year, perhaps more, I had found myself deliberately using her name less and less. It was as though I was trying to remove myself from what had seemed to me to be a developing eroticism in the new friendship between the three of us. As though I was unwilling to commit to the performance. In the bed next to me, Emma suffers no similar reticence. She begins to embroider the figure-eight on her back with kisses, using her name under her breath, erotic incantations between each kiss.Perhaps, I think to myself, it was a concern that Emma might feel a flash.
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