I pecked at her cheek diffidently. She hugged me again and told me to sleep well. I tried. The dream Chloe came and went in a few seconds and I despaired again. The next evening, over the statistics textbook I admitted to Chloe that she had appeared in my dreams. ‘Did I help?’ she asked as if appearing in my dreams was a natural thing to do. ‘For a few seconds and then the nightmares returned,’ I replied. ‘I’ll have to do better than that,’ Chloe replied. ‘Tomorrow night we are going to have a meal together and I’ll see if I can stay longer in your dreams.’ I accepted the invitation to the meal. I was so lost in my own self-pity and despair that I couldn’t see what good it would do. How could Chloe influence how long she would be present in my dreams? The meal passed without me really noticing what I ate. I was so wrapped up in myself that it could have been caviar or fish and chips. Actually it was a goulash served on a bed of rice and washed down with a fiery Bulgarian Red Wine. I. I had found peeing over the drain bad enough but if I had to shit in the pen it would be there for all to see. I would be brought to the level of an animal. Tears flowed down my face as I realised the horror I would have to face in the coming weeks. For several hours I clenched my arse cheeks together but I knew it was a loosing battle and in the end I got up an squatted over the drain and my bowels opened and I moaned in my humiliation. As my arms were tied I could do nothing to clean myself so had to lay down with the mess still on my arse and thighs. Four more time I had to get up in the night and squat over the drain.She laughed when she saw the mess on the drain and said I was not so posh now was I? All I could do was go red with embarrassment. It felt as if my world had ended. The bowels were put down, by the door, and she said eat. I hesitated to eat as I was sure she had used the laxative again. She said nothing but hit me across the shoulders with the crop so I.
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