Go into a cubicle. Sit and pee while wondering what Maisie and her girl do in bed. Clean yourself with paper and realise you don't know Maisie's girl's name. On the way back to Maisie's girl, keep watch for Maisie; see her in every female you pass.When you get back, Say: "Hey, Maisie's girl. You never told me your name." You never asked!" I'm asking now." Esme." I've never met an Esme before." Neither have I."Say, "My apartment is close." Of course it is." At the club entrance, before stepping out into the night, turn around to make sure Esme is following you. Repeat her name. Esme, over and over again.Out on the pavement, after only five paces she tells you to wait, says: "I can't walk in these," comes close and places a hand on your shoulder while she brings each foot up in turn and takes off her Jimmy Choos.Think about how her feet will get dirty. Say, "You'll ruin your feet," and then take off your shoes too, and then walk with her, arms hooked at the elbows while shoes dangle at. In my wife's handwriting itsaid:"Have fun this weekend! Love, Trish"The gift card was for a local spa. I was not surprised that my wife hadbought me a day at a spa, but I was interested by the wording on her note."Have fun this weekend." The spa day was only for Friday. What did "thisweekend" mean?Across from my parking spot, in a nondescript building was Leia's Spa. Istared at the glowing neon lettering and finally decided to head inside.I gathered my duffel bag and walked past the entrance, right to the frontdesk where an attractive woman, wearing a plain white t-shirt with a nametag above her left breast, hair in a ponytail and simple makeup, looked upat me and with a radiant smile said:"Good morning. How may I help you today?"I stared at her brown eyes and nervously replied: "Hi. I have a 9 amappointment today." Your name?" Jim Reynolds", I replied.She hit a few keys, and said: "I have you in our system saying this ispart of a special package. Do you have the gift card with.
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