What is the first name of God?” Forrest immediately speaks up, “Why that is easy St Peter, it is Andy!” St Peter replies “Why do you think it is Andy, Forrest?” “From the hymn St. Peter, ‘Andy walks with me, Andy talks with me” said Forrest in a sing-song voice. St. Peter stares at him for a minute, then opens the gate “Run, Forrest, Run”For nurses -What is the difference between a nurse and a toilet seat? A toilet seat only has to face one asshole at a time!What is long and black and hangs around an asshole? A stethoscope!This one is compliments of AttilaA brand new automation technology has been announced.It’s so advanced and effective, that from now on, only a pilot and a dog will be required in all aircraft.The pilot will be there to make sure the dog is fed and watered.The dog is there to bite the pilot if the pilot makes any move to touch the controls.This one is compliments of CalvinThere are these two tall trees growing side by side in the woods, a birch and a beech.One day a. All she wore underneath her smart suit were knickers and a bra, which she folded up neatly on a chair. She demurely pulled off her stockings, taking especial care not to snag them on her toe-nails. Then the two of them fell onto the mattress in the room and started making love in a very gentle way. Emma found Betty demure and perhaps reticent in a way she’d come to associate with Maisie, but at the same time she felt a little bored that Betty skirted around her genitals and spent so much more time licking and embracing her breasts. ‘Do you make love to women very often?’ Emma wondered. ‘Not very often,’ admitted Betty sitting up so that her trim figure was silhouetted against the window through which Emma assessed that anyone with a pair of binoculars in the building opposite would have a very clear view of what the two girls were doing. ‘How often is that?’ ‘Only when Ms Uruqhart requests,’ she said with a slightly troubled frown. ‘Aren’t I pleasing you?’ Emma smiled as broadly.
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