"Because it's you babe, whenever I get lonely and I've had enough, feel like giving up... "She picked up the phone, choking back sobs.Ryan switched off the music. "I love you Jen. Why do I do this to you?" he whispered. "I love you, I'm sorry. Please forgive me, just this last time." Ryan, why? You think I'm a slut. I'm a fucking whore to you!" No, no! You're not! I don't, I don't think it at all. I didn't mean it. I don't know why I did that. I was just mad. Please, please know that. I'm sorry, I didn't mean it."She didn't answer him, crying and still angry, but knowing deep down that she would forgive him. She loved him too much not to."I love you, I'm sorry I ever thought you cheated on me. I shouldn't have jumped to conclusions like that." You think I'm a slut," she repeated in a whisper."I don't! Jen, I don't! I love you, more than anything. I was just mad. Please?" I love you Ryan," she said, still sounding a bit angry. "I can't stay mad at you, you know that. So why do you do. She didn’t recall any attempts — but then I wouldn’t, would I? — and in fact the painful clarity with which she remembered her many degradations seemed even worse. If he’s made me forget something, it’s certainly not what he’s doing to my body. Or have there been other, even worse depredations that I fail to recall? Perhaps something that would justify my inexplicable submission to his perversions? Even as she wondered, she was confronted by doubt. No, he’d want me to remember every humiliating moment.Meanwhile, the more pressing question still loomed.I still don’t see how to take advantage of this discovery. Who could I tell? What would I tell them? It’s no use trying to convince the King that he’s been manipulated through chicanery, for his memory of it was almost certainly erased. Worse, I disobeyed his direct orders to acquire the vial; a defense that Wormtongue will obviously seize upon at the first opportunity.Could I somehow go around the King and convince the rest of the.
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