" I did, of course. It went right to my head. They laughed and said that I was a good girl. I finished the cigarette. They said I looked ready for action. Tyrone handed me my package of regular cigarettes, my lighter and a glass of bourbon and opened the door. I took a deep breath, picked up my little fur purse, and thought to myself why am I hesitating? This is what I was born to be, a motel whore. I didn't realize what was in that parking lot. It was a zoo. By now it was about 5:00 a.m. and still dark out. The parking lot was full of low rider cars, limos, Harley Davidsons, Vets, Cadillacs, and rental cars from the nearby airport. As I walked out the door, it closed and I heard the lock turned. I was on my own now. Room 282 was now closed to me. I had to earn my way back. I could see them gather at the window, smiling, laughing and slapping each other on the back. I slung the purse over my shoulder and walked toward the stair well to the parking lot. The crowd in the parking lot was. It seems like some things that I have to stop and think about used to come automatically.”“You took a nasty rap to the head,” he said. “I think you’ll recover this quickly enough.” We started with basics like the notes on the chart and what strings and frets related to them. I was relieved that it made sense pretty quickly but my first shot at actually playing the notes in the exercise was a disaster. I had something concrete to work with, though.I was suffocating. I couldn’t get air in my lungs. I knew I was going to die. My fingers couldn’t hold on. I was going to just let go. But the angel was there. She wouldn’t let go of my hand. It was the only thing I could feel. I knew that as long as she held my hand, I would survive. I prayed to her not to let go, even when I couldn’t grip her.I hadn’t had the dream in a week or more. I could feel my eyes trying to cry but the tears were dry. It was like they were being sucked out of me like my life was. “Don’t let go of me, angel,” I.
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