‘This is a very serious matter, Olga – very serious indeed. There is no doubt that you were engaged in perverse congress with another pupil – and, what is worse, a younger girl whom you had enticed, perhaps even pressured.’ There was no answer possible to this, as Olga would not make matters better for herself by claiming that Simone had been an eager participant (indeed, had almost seduced her rather than the other way round), and she would not make things worse for the younger girl by telling tales on her. So Olga just looked at the carpet, red-faced and with the tracks of tears on her cheeks, and mumbled something quite unintelligible. Vera sniffed disapprovingly, and then gave a slight sigh. To Olga’s horror, the head teacher then said: ‘I’m afraid that you must be expelled from the school; you will have to leave immediately, and I will write to your parents to tell them of the reason for your removal.’ Olga felt almost faint and staggered, clutching the edge of the desk to. Inside, I sat down on my bed and tried to make sense and order of the things I'd learned, and of the three women most responsible for my being alive, and for the twelve years I'd spent at St. Cecelia's. The woman, Anne Coulter, that I'd seen slumped over in a drunken stupor, had thrown me away like some unwanted garbage. Her mother seemed even more callous. And yet, and this was the part I was having trouble accepting, they were both a part of me. The blood that ran through my veins was, in large part, theirs. I hated them both, but I wanted and needed to hear from them, everything they could tell me about my birth, and those lost first years of mine. The hate part had been festering from my first awareness in the orphanage. Somehow, I had always known that I had been thrown away. I had felt like I'd been discarded. It was one thing to feel like that, and quite another to find out it was true.I didn't make it down for dinner. The phone rang several times, but I didn't answer it..
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