"Chris gave the letter to Hassan and Alyssa to read, and as they read it, Shahia and Chris held them tight. Perhaps because they already knew how bad the letter was, they didn't have a panic attack, though they were terribly devastated. All four of them took turns crying and raging, as Shahia gradually took back her mothering role and encouraged them all to express how they were feeling.Chris stayed late that night, helping Shahia as she gradually settled. They talked about little else, and by the end of the evening, they'd hesitantly agreed that this grandmother had actually been trying to do her a favour by letting her know what was going on, and by sending her such an apparently loving but patently inflammatory letter. If only they could be sure. Chris took it home in order to show it to his parents and make lots of copies. If it came to it, this letter was going to get as much publicity as he could arrange.Tuesday 4-Sep 2007Chris was just going through warm-ups at First Eleven. I focus on better, positive thoughts. On healthier imaginings. The other part of me is happy you no longer suffer. I couldn’t stand to hear you talk about the pain. It made me feel helpless, the simple words I had to offer seeming insignificant and paltry. The ache is eased simply knowing your pain is forever gone. I smile thinking of you reunited with your daughter. The daughter we all wanted, who left too soon. I can see you both, beautiful and happy, relaxing together in a warm, sun dappled meadow, finally at peace. I don’t know how long it will take for my pain to ease completely. It could be weeks, or years. I do know I will never forget you. There is a very warm and safe place in my heart, and perhaps even in my soul, that belongs to you. To your memory. You were the first woman I fell in love with. I wanted you in my life in a permanent and endless way. I will remember your gentle spirit. The obvious depth of your love for your children. Your name will forever conjure.
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