We had this neighbour, Mike, who visited us on occasional evenings for a drink and a chat. The one memorable thing about Mike was that he smoked a particular brand of cigarettes, and always used matches, instead a lighter. At the time I worked as a junior executive with a British oil company in their London office, and sometimes had to be away from home regularly for up to a week on business. On one Friday when I arrived home from such a trip the first thing Carol wanted to do was fuck I hardly had time to take my shoes off! After an hour or so of our vigorous sex we sat down for a meal, and I immediately spotted a pack of the brand of cigarettes Mike smoked, and a box of matches on a small table beside an armchair. I pointed them out to Carol and asked her if Mike had been round. She said he hadnt but, that shed taken up smoking and had bought the same brand as him. After our meal she sat and smoked one of the cigarettes but didnt look completely comfortable doing it. I never saw. I worked hard and she seemedto be always complaining.One day I said:"Carol, who wears the trousers?"She said:"We both wear trousers, Nicky." That's not what I meant."I didn't realise it then, that she had understood exactly what I meant andthat this comment signified that up to now we had both made decisionstogether but that now she was taking over."Who makes more money?" I said.She accepted that I made more money than her and that I thought sheaccepted that I wore the trousers. I could not have been more wrong.That day she started playing a hypnosis tape as I slept each evening. Idid not realise that she was doing this. The tape said:"You are tired of being a man. This is because you are only pretending tobe a man. Really you are a woman trapped in a man's body. Yourgirlfriend Carol is trying to keep you trapped in a man's body. She isworried that you will become a more beautiful woman than she is. Everymorning you hear the parrot say "Pretty Polly" you will put on an item.
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