"To hang them from a lamp post by," Edie explained, "It is unbearable," she said, "Pedophiles abusing poor little children when there are so many single ladies in their prime crying out to be loved." Right," I said, "Tragic." I knew you would understand," Edie said, "Compartment number 5," she said and winked at me."Look," I said."Better humour her," the priest said in a whisper, "Actually she bangs quite nicely for an old bird." What?" I demanded."Generous Scottish hospitality, it would be churlish to refuse," the priest added."Fucks sake!" I cursed but well, where else was I getting laid, like the bible basher said, churlish to refuse, so that why I was at it with a fifty something granny as the train rolled through Corrour and Rannoch, the most pointless fucking stations in the middle of fucking nowhere you ever did fucking see.I shagged worse, must have, just can't think of any at present, I half thought of turning queer at one time as I banged her in time to the fucking train. Oh, hot date?No, Mark, it's ... you're kidding, right?Well, only kinda. Shouldn't you have climbed back on the bike by now?What? Listen, it's only been a few months...Seven. ... and anyway, how would you know?You think our kids only talk to you, Lisa?No, no. Of course not. Oh, God, what are they saying?Just that they hadn't seen David in a while, and that when they asked you...Yeah, I told them it was over. ... you told ... yeah.Okay, listen, it's not so easy, you know.Oh, I know, alright.Yeah. Can you remind me, Mark? Why did we split up? What is that noise?It's ... hold on, one question at a time. We couldn't stand being in the same house. Remember? Screaming and throwing things?I never threw...Me.Oh.Yeah.Sorry, Mark.For what, exactly?For bringing it up.Fine. So anyway, next weekend. Can the boys come over?Yeah, I think so. I'll have to check, and call you back. It's the bath.Cool. The bath?Yeah.What is?The noise.Oh. You're in the bath?Yeah.You ... Mark, you never have a bath.I do,.
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